Practically Perfect

By the (Bbm7)time the wind has blown the weathervane around,

I'll (C7)show you if I can.

No (Bbm7)matter what the circumstance, for one thing I'm renowned:

my (F)character is (Fm)spit spot spick and (C)span.

I'm practically (C7)perfect in ev'ry (F)way.

Practically (C7)perfect, so people (Fsus)say.

(Bb)Each virtue virtu'lly knows no (Am7)bound.

(G)Each trait is (G7)great and patently (Bb)sound.

(C7)I'm practically perfect from head to (F)toe.

If I had a (G7)fault, it would (A7)never dare to (Dm7)show.

(G7)I'm so (F)(E)practically (Bb)perfect in (C7)every (F)way.

(Dm)Both prim and (A)proper and (Dm)never too (A)stern.

(Dm)Well (A)educated, yet (Dm)willing to (A)learn.

(F)I'm clean and (C7)honest, my (F)manner (C7)refined,

(Ab)and I wear (G7)shoes of the (C7)sensible kind.

I (E)suffer no (Bb)nonsense and (E)whilst I (Bb)remain,

there's nothing else I (Gm7)feel I need explain.

I'm (F)practically

(D)I'm practically (D7)perfect,

and here's my (G)aim:

by the time I (D7)leave here you both will be the (Em7)same.

(A)You'll be (G)(F#)practically (D7)perfect,

(G)(F#)practically (D7)perfect.

You will be (G)(Em7)practically (Am7)perfect in (D7)ev'ry (G)way.