Grandma's Killer Fruitcake

The holidays were upon us and (F)things were goin' (C)fine,

'til the day I heard the doorbell and a (D7)chill ran up my spine.

(G7)I (C)grabbed the wife and children as the (F)postman wheeled it in;

(C)a yearly Christmas nightmare has (D7)just come back again.

(G7)It was (C)harder than the head of Uncle Bucky;

(F)heavy as a sermon of (C)Preacher Lucky;

one's enough to give the whole (Am)state of Kentucky a (D7)great big belly (G7)ache!

It was (C)denser than a drove of barnyard turkeys;

(F)tougher than a truckload of (C)allbeef jerky;

drier than a drought in (Am)Albuquerque;

(G7)Grandma's killer (C)fruitcake.

holidays were upon us and (F)at our fam'ly (C)feast.

'til the day I heard the doorbell just to (D7)keep the fam'ly peace.

(G7)I (C)grabbed the wife and children but the (F)said it tasted fine.

(C)a yearly Christmas nightmare is (D7)where I draw the line.

(G7)It was (C)harder than the head of Uncle Bucky;

(F)heavy as a sermon of (C)Preacher Lucky;

one's enough to give the whole (Am)state of Kentucky a (D7)great big belly (G7)ache!

It was (C)denser than a drove of barnyard turkeys;

(F)tougher than a truckload of (C)allbeef jerky;

drier than a drought in (Am)Albuquerque;

(G7)Grandma's killer (C)fruitcake.

(A7)cake. It's (D)early Christmas mornin';

the (G)phone rings us awake.

(E7)how we liked the cake?

(A7)It was (D)harder than the head of Uncle Bucky;

(G)heavy as a sermon of (D)Preacher Lucky;

one's enough to give the whole (Bm)state of Kentucky a (E7)great big belly (A7)ache!

It was (D)denser than a drove of barnyard turkeys;

(G)tougher than a truckload of (D)allbeef jerky;

drier than a drought in (Bm)Albuquerque;

(E7)Grandma's (A7)killer fruit...

(E7)Grandma's (A7)killer fruit...

(E7)Grandma's (A7)killer (D)fruitcake!

(A7)Grandma's killer (D)fruitcake!